Everything Happens for a Reason…

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FootprintsI know there are a lot of people out there who are going through particular life challenges at the moment and for some reason there seems more than usual…
My path has crossed with a number of kindred spirits and we all seem to be sharing a very similar path at the moment in relation to the shifting sands of our circumstances, and specifically getting a job!  I’ve found the main thing that keeps me going in these times of change are to just keep listening to my intuition/heart…it’s always right, even though it might not ‘seem’ it on the outside.  We’re here for lessons along our journey and unfortunately the hard one’s are the one’s that make us grow and become stronger…
 

Here is a very poignant post from a lovely young woman named Erin Smith who has crossed my path recently, please enjoy…

Everything Happens for a Positive Reason…

If there is one word that I would use to describe myself, it would be emotional. This can be both a great and a not so great quality to possess. It is my emotions that dictate how I perceive life and my experiences. My emotional take on the world can lead to a lot of questions and a lot of negativity. I can be an extreme pessimist at times which I find ironic because in my blog I preach optimism. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason, sometimes we just need to dig a little deeper and look beyond the initial impact that an event or person might have on us.

Unemployed and depressed…

Until a couple weeks ago, I had been unemployed for three months. Now, this choice was a decision made partly by me and partly by the job market. I moved a few States away to be with my boyfriend of two years. I made the decision for myself, leaving a job that I no longer enjoyed and saving my tax refund cheque to pay my bills for the next few months while I searched for a new career. After a month or two, I became depressed. What if I made the wrong decision? Why were people impressed by my Resume and interview skills but reluctant to hire me? I sat around most days and watched television, job searched on the internet, and ate junk food. It was easy to take the negative route, easy to gain sympathy from other people. I saw no reason to change my attitude, after all I was going on interviews, I was doing all I could do, but no one wanted to hire me. Not my fault. That’s where I was wrong. It was my fault; my sour attitude was completely my fault.

I knew I needed to change…

I knew I needed to regain the self-confidence and strength that I once possessed. I had been looking at this period in my life all wrong. I was focusing on the jobs I wanted but couldn’t get, focusing on the jobs I was offered but knew I would hate, focusing on not having my friends and family around me. That’s when I decided to turn around my attitude.

Welcome solitude…

I went for walks in the park. I made phone calls to friends and family. I started to journal more regularly. I began a blog in April. I found the reason for my unemployment and my solitude. The time alone became welcome and no longer scary. I was lucky to have time to reflect and find the peace that I didn’t realize I had needed so desperately. The last few months have allowed me to focus on me. I began to understand just how much I had neglected myself.

Ignoring the voice inside your heart…

At my old job, I had become so run down by the needs of other people and my desire to please everyone that I let my own needs fall by the wayside. I became so wrapped up in making sure everyone else was happy that I forgot to check up on myself. Now, I think it’s very admirable to make sure others are cared for and happy, but when you put another’s needs before your own, it can become dangerous. When you are ignoring the voice inside your head, the voice inside your heart, you are silencing the very things that define who you are. If you can’t make yourself happy, how can you help others to be happy? How can you claim to be the best example for others to follow?

Back where I started…

Currently, I am back at the same job that I left months ago, only part time for now. At first I saw this as a failure; I moved States away to leave this job and now here I am with no money left going back to the same place again. However, I have realised that I am not a failure. In the time spent away from the job, I have focused on myself. I now have an article published online, I am going through more journals and writing more per day than I ever thought I was capable of, I no longer have to carry the burden of a long distance relationship. Am I in my ideal career? Of course not, but am I making money now? Yes, yes I am, and despite being with the same Company, I am now with a more positive bunch of individuals in a better environment.

Understanding the reason…

Everything happens for a reason. I have found that the key comes in understanding that reason, not in blaming ourselves or the world. Why is this happening to me? Why am I feeling this way? What motivated me to get to this place? These questions don’t have to be negative, you can use them to probe and explore in an optimistic way. There is always a positive, even in the midst of a seemingly negative cloud of energy, even in the midst of death, even in the midst of depression; you just have to find it. Sometimes it takes more than one glance or one question or one breakdown to find it, but keep looking. Clarity is out there, we just have to be strong enough to pursue it.

Erin SmithErin Smith is an aspiring writer. She is a strong believer in the powers of emotion and creativity. She has begun blogging as a beginning to her path to self-discovery at kaleidoscopeyes and hopes to continue gaining strength through writing and enlightenment through experience.
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Comments

  1. Fantastic article!!! Just what I needed to read right now :o) So important to look after ourselves as well as others, otherwise we can become so lost.

    • Hi Sonya, yes looking after ourselves is No. 1, and that’s not being selfish…if we are only running on 1/2 a tank then we can’t give fully to anyone else…we need to fill ourselves up first, to be able to give to others. Finding the hidden meaning in things that are happening usually occurs further down the track – good ‘ole hindsight! But if we can find the meaning and learn from it, then it’s a lesson well learned 🙂 Kia Kaha – be strong xx 🙂

  2. Wow, what an amazing article! She will definitely become a great writer. Her honesty will resonate with a lot of people. Especially the part about not looking after yourself. That is how I become if I’m low … I sit on the couch with a bag of chips and watch a movie – shut myself away from the world. Its part of a ‘feeling sorry for myself attitude’ that when im down i think i deserve to have. Im not perfect, but its about having open eyes and recognising that you’re in a bad place so you can pull yourself out of it.

    • Hi Joelene, yes, we can certainly all relate to that. I think it’s ok to feel that way at times, we can’t be ‘perfect’ all the time; the trick is to not let it linger on for too long and recognise (as Erin did) that it’s now time to change your attitude and get out of it. Thanks for sharing 🙂

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